Afraid..

Well it's all happening all over again, my best friend is making me choose. Her or him..

A few months ago my old best friend of almost two years made me choose. & I just couldn't, I couldn't choose between my best friend & the love of my life. & the fact that she was making me choose was horrible. & the hardest thing I could have ever done..

& now, the same thing is happening again.. My best friend that I live with is making me choose.. I can't lose her, & I can't lose him either. Me & him already talked about this, but it's just I am scared to do that.. & last night when she asked me, she wouldn't even let me answer her question. She said, "Well for now on I am going to start being distant with you, & tonight I am sleeping on the couch." & then she walked out of the room & I began balling my eyes out...

I can't do this, I can't lose any more people.. Especially my two best friends..

I just can't.. & if I have to do it to save my friendship with her, then I guess I am going to have to do what me & him talked about yesterday.. Which is going to suck since I already don't get to see him.. & I really don't see how it is going to work..

I don't see how anything is going to work..

I am just scared.. I am afraid.